To be honest, this was a hard week; I struggled with confidence every day. In previous blog posts, I’ve written about how confidence has been an issue my entire life, but today I had a realization and I hope it helps anyone who is also struggling with confidence.
I decided to take some time for self-care this morning and play my flute.Although I hadn’t played the flute in a while, it came back to me easily. I reflected on my journey with playing the flute and realized that it hadn’t been easy. When I was younger and had first started playing the flute, I hit many bumps in the road and felt like giving up because nothing came easy. I spent hours practicing and perfecting each piece, learning the basics and then the technical skills. But I put in the hard work then, which now makes playing the flute a little easier.
How does this all relate to music therapy and my internship? I felt confident in my flute playing because I had practiced and worked for so many years on it and now it comes naturally to me. During my internship, I am taking voice lessons, learning to play different styles on the guitar/piano, and practicing improvisation. This week, specifically, I beat myself up because I struggled in these areas and was not “perfect.” Just like I struggled with my flute playing at first, which is now an extremely comfortable instrument for me, I will get comfortable with singing, playing those different styles on guitar or piano, and improvising during a session, if I practice them frequently. My confidence will increase over time. It took me several years to be confident in my flute playing, but I was eventually confident, with practice.
You can’t expect yourself to be great at a new skill immediately; that is what I learned this week. Sometimes you just have to get out of your own head and stop expecting perfection. When I first started playing flute, I wasn’t perfect and I STILL can grow and learn new skills even after playing for so long. The same things apply to my internship. I choose to keep learning, growing, trying my best, and being confident that confidence with these skills WILL come with practice.
Life is a fun journey and it’s even better with confidence!
Have a good week!