Welcome back to Intern’s Corner! Thank you for joining me as I complete week 9 of my internship! I can’t believe I’ve already finished week one of month three!!! Time is flying so fast! This past week has been really good! Yes, as usual there were ups, downs, and frustrations, but like I’ve said before, without them I can’t learn how to become better.
Trying to figure out what I wanted to blog about this week was kind of a struggle. As I thought back through my week, a conversation with two of my directors stuck out to me. After a frustrating day with a client, my director sat me down and debriefed with me. During the conversation she made a comment that the criticism that is given to me comes from a place of love and care.
As much as I love constructive criticism, it is something that is really challenging for me to deal with. Meaning, I take in the feedback and then become extremely critical of myself. When things are pointed out, I get mad and frustrated at myself for messing up — even the tiniest of things. That’s the perfectionist in me.
Back in high school, I took two psych classes during which our teacher had us take personality tests. When I took the test back then, I had been placed in the INFJ, -A/-T (Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging, Assertive, Turbulent) grouping. I decided to retake the test to see if I was still in that group or if maybe things had changed over the past 6 years.
While I was working one of my weekend jobs, I re-took the test whenever there was down time. Word of advice: don’t multi task when taking a personality test because you lose your train of thought and in all honesty, your results won’t be too accurate. When I finished the test, I found out that I had been regrouped into the ENFJ group.
To be honest, I wasn’t completely thrilled about this. As I read through the descriptions of this personality type, I did agree with a lot of what was being said but there were times where I was like, “ummm, no.” So before writing this blog, I sat down, focused and took the test again! And guess what!? I truly am an INFJ personality.
So, as a way for you all to get to know me a little better I thought I would give you all a summary of my personality type! (P.S. some of my own comments are in there!)
INFJ Personality Type: “The Advocate”
- 53% Introverted/ 47% Extroverted
- 52% Intuition/ 48% Observant
- 24% Thinking/ 76% Feeling
- 67% Judging/ 33% Prospecting
- 47% Assertive/ 53% Turbulent
Quick Facts about “The Advocate”
- Members of the Diplomat Role Group that have an “inborn sense of idealism and morality” and are “capable of taking concrete steps to realize their goals and make a lasting positive impact.
- Advocates see helping others as their purpose in life and have a real passion to get to the heart of an issue so that people don’t have to be “rescued” at all. (good thing I’m becoming a music therapist then!)
- Act with creativity, imagination, conviction, and sensitivity to create balance. (AGAIN! Good thing I’m becoming a music therapist!)
- Advocates must remember to take care of themselves; their passions can take them past a breaking point finding themselves exhausted, unhealthy, and stressed. (OH man guess who wrote an entire blog on SELF-CARE!?!!)
- Other advocate personalities include: Martin Luther King. Nelson Mandela, St. Mother Teresa, Nicole Kidman, Jimmy Carter, and more.
- Fun fact: My friends used to call me Pocahontas in high school; granted it was for my super long hair…but hey!
- Creative (Well duh)
- Insightful (again, duh)
- Inspiring and Convincing
- Decisive (I mean I’m extremely indecisive when it comes to picking out the restaurant I want to eat at, but ask me about some bigger decisions and I usually have an idea as to what I want. )
- Determined and Passionate ( oh that’s why I’m was always up until like 3 am working inn high school and college!)
- This one really stuck out to me when reading the description. It said that I am highly vulnerable to criticism and conflict. When I thought about this past week and some other occasions in the past I realized how true this was for me.
- Extremely Private
- Perfectionistic (THIS IS ME!!!)
- Always need to have a cause
- Can burn out easily
The profile continues onto to describe this personality type behaviors within romantic relationships, friendships, parenthood, work habits, and career paths. It then provides a conclusion about the personality type and opportunities to learn even more. (Of course which requires you to pay money…so I just stuck with the free version!)
So you are all probably thinking, “Rachel, why did you write an entire blog on your personality?!?! This was kind of boring and useless. Come on!” Well here’s my point. As I was thinking about how I was going to title this blog, I got a little worried because I didn’t think I was going to be able to make it Disney related (shocker! I know!). But then I remembered my absolute favorite scene from Moana.
In this scene Moana is facing Te Ka who is extremely enraged and has already damaged Maui’s magical fishhook. Te ka starts charging towards Moana full of anger, rage, and ready to destroy. Moana instead of cowering away and showing fear, stands tall and walks calmly towards Te Ka, closing the gap between them even faster.
As she is walking, Moana sings the following words:
I have crossed the horizon to find you
I know your name
They have stolen the heart from inside you
But this does not define you
This is not who you are
You know who you are
I don’t want to give too many spoilers about the movie for those who still haven’t seen it, so go watch it! The first time I watched this movie at my friends place, I secretly cried to myself. I hid my face with the blanket and tried to make my wiping of tears a “I’m just itching my face” gesture. I was embarrassed and didn’t want my friend knowing that I was crying. This scene and the song really speaks to me and where I’m at in my life right now.
Leading up to my internship, my entire world was turned upside down. I was dealing with a lot of things and lost who I truly was in my heart. To be completely honest, not everything has resolved and it’s been a very long and hard journey trying to find myself again, but I’m getting there slowly. Something that has helped has been learning who I truly am as a person. In the past I had let so many people control me that I didn’t know what I truly wanted, I just thought this is how I’m supposed to be.
Through my internship and the help and guidance of my internship directors, I’ve been slowly finding my true self again. Taking this personality test really did give me a good insight about somethings that I didn’t know about myself. I think it’s really important for each one of us to truly know as much as we can about ourselves so that we can be the best version of ourselves. Now I’m not saying that the personality type you get and the descriptions are the law and that’s what you have to stick with, but it’s a good guidance that needs to be taken with a grain of salt.
My journey to finding myself again has been long and extremely hard and I know I still have a long way to go, but I also know that it is going to be completely worth it in the end. One of my favorite people in this entire world is St. Mother Teresa, who — get this — is also known as “The Advocate” personality. My favorite quote from her is: “Do small things with great love”. I try and follow this everyday and I have wonderful reminders of it. I’ve got to wall hangings and a notebook that were gifted by friends.
If you would like to find out your personality type and learn more about yourself I’ve included the website at the end of this blog. So friends, there you have it, that’s week 9 for you in somewhat of a nutshell. (Lies…this was more like a mini book! Sorry!)
I hope you all have a wonderful week and please remember: always do what you love and don’t be afraid to learn and understand things about yourself. What matters is what you do with that information, if you use it the right way, not only will you benefit from it but so will everyone that encounters you!
Have a wonderful week!